Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Ten Things You Should Never Ask Your Spouse
I haven't blogged in awhile. You know what I have been doing? My daily regimen of asking my husband completely off the wall questions. Since I am well versed in the spousal questioning strategy, I thought I'd share a few questions you should NEVER ask your spouse. Upon asking these questions, you will be met with bewilderment, disgust, dismay, confusion and he might possibly walk away mumbling.
1. Honey, will you go shopping with me? I'm thinking cardigans, tights and riding boots. Doesn't that sound fun?
2. Babe, I think I have an ingrown hair in my armpit. Will you check it?
3. How short should I cut my hair? Halle Berry's hair is cute short.
4. If I die young, will you read this book at my funeral? But not if I die old, in that case, read that other book I was telling you about. Don't you remember that book?
5. Am I acting like I'm about to start my period?
6. Babe, will you please not lock the door when you go to the bathroom? I might need to get in there at any time.
7. Do you think Sofia Vergara's boobs are too big?
8. Is it okay if I Mod Podge pictures directly to the wall? I have a craft idea.
9. Hon, my period IS about to start. Will you bring home a gallon of ice cream, a tub of cream cheese and two Snickers bars?
10. So honey. Won't you be sad if it's really not an ingrown hair and it's actually a cancer lump but you wouldn't check it because you're too grossed out? Why won't you check my armpit??
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