Thursday, June 16, 2011

Do NOT Scold Me in Joann

Dear Meddling Lady in Joanne who thought my child was being ignored,

First of all, how could you?  Don't you realize that Joann is my happy place?  I have no idea how to use 75% of  the things in the store, but I love to meander through the aisles and look.  I often get lost but it's okay.  Time stands still in Joann.

When it was time to check out, you were in front of me and noticed my oh-so-precious baby boy.  He probably proffered you a smile and probably pointed at something in your basket, always a conversation starter. 

I didn't notice you noticing him because I was checking my phone.  I had posted an on the fly bump post on my blog and people loved it.  I felt special and had to respond to everyone right away.

But my kid was not running around, he was not acting a fool.  He was sitting nicely in his stroller, playing with his new book (only $1 folks and it's cute) and basking in your attention.  You see, Meddling Lady, one of the things he inherited from me was his love of attention.  One day he'll grow up and be a blogger as well, I'm sure of it.

So, when he took his sippy cup out of the cupholder and accidentally bumped his chin, it was because he was looking at you and not paying attention to the task at hand.  He's 15 months old and not quite a multitasker.  You'll forgive him that, I'm sure.

You gasped like he had fallen on a bed of nails, which shook me from my reverie.  I looked at my child, slurping his water from the sippy and said, "Good job bud!" 

The thing is, he was doing a good job.  He's recently mastered the art of drinking through a straw, and this is a big deal.  The sippy has a straw and he was going to town on it.  When I told him good job, I meant it.  I wasn't just vacantly praising my child.

But when you, Meddling Lady, decided to get stank with me and tell me that he had just hit his chin with the cup and "I saw the whole thing because I was looking at him," it made me want a lot of things I have deemed inappropriate upon becoming a mother. 

I didn't do any of those things.  I made the comment of how he's easy to look at because he's so cute and that I deduced he was okay given the lack of tears and mark on his chin.  Lucky for everyone involved, it was then your turn in line, and you gave my son one last apologetic look (seriously, lady?) and turned around to pay for your stuff.

M'kay, let's just get one thing straight here.  Please, scold me if my child is a) crying, b) dirty, c) sad, d) covered with bumps.  On the flip side, kindly throw the stank tone out the window if my child is a) smiling b)happy c) clean, d) curious or e) ALL OF THE ABOVE.

Toph was all of the above and is always all of the above.

Thank you kindly and may we never cross paths at Joann again,

Mama’s Losin’ It


leslie@gleaninggrace said...

Oh, my!
I totally feel your pain!
I followed your story well - like I was there while it happened.
Why is it that some women think it is ok to give unsolicited advice?
I can't tell how many times my kids have been scolded or disciplined by me (because they deserved it) and some idiot who thinks they know best comes to put in their two cents!
They might as well say to my child, "what a mean mommy you have!"
To which I want to reply, "mind your own business!"
Stopping by from MamaKat's...
read my workshop entry at

k_skenes said...

Nope; DON'T scold you if your child is crying, dirty, etc, etc, as it's really nobody else's business, and sometimes crying is necessary, dirt is fun, etc, etc.

Amanda Joy said...

Thanks so much for joining our Mingle With Us Blog Hop. I am excited to follow your blog, as all of the posts I just read made me smile or shake my head in agreement:)

Amanda Joy

Lauren said...

First, thank you for calling it Joann, and not Joann's! Second, I'm sorry that lady busted up in your business. I had a similar incident happen to me at the Children's Museum in San Diego. I scolded David for throwing something over the balcony (something he had already done) and a woman told me he "He didn't know any better" as she gave me a look of death for scolding him and him the look of pity for having such a horrible mama. I was livid! Busybodies...ugh!

TriGirl said...

Yeeeeeeeessssshhhhhh. I *suppose* people think they're helping in those situations, but honestly. People. Toddlers are clumsy; and they get over it right away. And i agree with another commenter: if your baby is dirty it's still not up to a stranger to shoot you looks of death. Real danger, absolutely. Keeping himself happy, leaving him alone. Oy.

Jacki said...

Oh you didn't know that when you became a mother you instantly and voluntarily advertised for constant criticism? That info wasn't in your pregnany planning brochure?

It is insane how people judge, especially how they judge mothers. Congrats on keeping calm. I likely would have rammed her ankles with the stroller.

Nina @ Momma Go Round said...

Oh that's just the worst! I took LJ to Costco last night and he was having a fit. I got so many dirty looks., but love how no one who threw the dirty look cared to find out that he'd been at the splash park all morning and was now on day two of refusing to nap. If being a momma has taught me anything its that kids don't care what our schedule is and never to judge what is going on with another kid cause who knows what the whole story is. Gotta love people who stick their faces where they don't belong!

Eve said...

Ugh! Some people are the worst! I had a lady give me crap at Whole Foods once because Handsome wasn't wearing socks. It was like 70 degrees and he had socks on when we got there, but kicked them off while sitting in the shopping cart. I let him keep them off and gnaw on a banana while I shopped for organic food to feed him. But yeah, I'm a terrible mother. She told me his feet were cold AND I shouldn't be at the store right now anyway because it was "too early" for a baby to be awake. OMG! Clearly she didn't know my boy and his need to wake up at 5 a.m. I tell you, if I wasn't raise properly I may have told her where to put her unwelcomed comments!

LisaWeidknecht said...

I'm a new follower! Come follow me too?

LINDY said...

It's such a travesty that people fail to think before they speak. :/
I found you on the Thirsty Thursday hop. Really enjoyed reading your posts, the "I'm that girl" post was very touching! I am your newest e-mail subscriber and GFC follower and would love it if you would stop by my blog when you get a chance! :P

Brittney said...

WOW! She may have reported me to child's services today if she had seen me lol I was in Dollar General and as I was checking out my 4 year old was behind me and then I heard a loud crash he pulled a clearance cart with cans in it on top oh him. Seriously i let go of his hand for 2 seconds to get my debit card out of my wallet!

People can be so weird & rude i mean wow! I love that shirt bTW

malia said...

That's crazy... I've actually gotten into a verbal exchange with EMPLOYEES at JoAnn's who were being cruel to an elderly man!

Newest follower via Thirsty Thursday would love for you to consider following me back xo Malia

Anonymous said...

Hey girl, I've been there and it feels horrible and you wonder, what did I do wrong. Good for you for restraining your words...keep smiling thru grinding teeth right?
I really love your writing style, it flows and keeps me engaged. =)
Also...I just found Pour Your Heart Out TODAY! What a cool idea. I haven't read your post just yet but am anticipating it and some of the others I have missed.
Hope you're staying cool!

Anjie said...

Ugh, what a twit that lady was! I agree with k_skenes, I don't ever want scolded by a stranger. It's none of their business. lol

Chef in Training said...

It's not their business or place to scold you. I am visiting from the hop! I am your newest follower and would love it if you would follow me back! thanks so much!

bluebell screams said...

Apparently having a kid instantly means you want advice and judgment from any and everyone. And I love the onesie pic-wonder where I could actually buy one?

New follower from the Say Hi Sunday hop!

Sara said...

Crazy! I'm totally one to chat up a kid, when it seems appropriate and the mom/dad doesn't seem to mind. And lordy I would never "impart my wisdom" on you. The only time I would even consider speaking up is if you were downright YELLING and/or hitting/spanking your child. And even then it depends on the circumstances...

Almost every other comment has a "I'm from" addition ... I'm following you from my GFC blog update :)