Yesterday we went to Hancock Fabric. We're making a foldable poker table and hubs needed some felt and vinyl. We thew caution to the wind and decided not to go to the trouble of getting the stroller out; we would carry the baby and/or let him explore.
A toddler's idea of exploring, as you know, is different from an adult's idea.
I started off carrying Toph and he started squirming to get down. I put him down and he immediately began to tear through the aisles, no premeditated thought; just running and squealing with delight.
That's when he found the breakable porcelain knick knacks.
No, Toph! We mustn't touch those. I made to pick him up.
That was the first of the screaming.
He screeched, he turned, he gyrated, he threw his head back. He sobbed.
One thing I learned about myself during these episodes is that I will break out into a cold sweat when he starts this up. That means while I'm wrestling and wrangling an upset toddler, I am also periodically wiping cold perspiration from my brow. I could do without the extra work.
This happened repeatedly while husband was picking out his materials. It was during these episodes that I was able to look at myself objectively and think,
If we can just get through this, he won't be like this forever.
While that thought heartened me and strengthened my resolve, the truth of it slapped me across the face as well.
He won't be like this forever.
No, he won't. He won't always throw fits. He won't always be teething. He won't always chuck his food on the floor.
He won't be like this forever.
He won't always cling tightly to me until he falls asleep. He won't always kiss me at random and unexpected times. He won't always squeal with delight when he sees me. He won't always laugh at my funny faces.
He won't be like this forever.
Like Melissa, I've resolved to always remember that these are the best days of my life. The days he loves me and Matt more than anyone in the world. The days he needs us more than any other human. The days he wants nothing more than to be with us. These days....these days are the best and no amount of toddlerhood-induced fit throwing can convince me otherwise.
He won't be like this forever and these are the best days of my life.
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4 comments:
Oh, this is making me tear up because I have thought the exact thing. Especially when the Babby is annoyingly clingy (which sounds terrible in writing, but you know what I mean). Sometimes, when I'm just starting to get irritated, my brain shifts gears and says: Someday she won't want to even be near me, much less hug me, much less snuggle up to my side in her "nest" and lay her cheek on my thigh.
And that's all going to happen too dang soon :(
I needed this. Wee 'Burb has been soooo clingy to me lately. She's fine with people if I am not there, but even with Scott, she'll cling to me. Which often means I have to do EVERYTHING with her. Even on the nights it's Scott's turn to give her a bath, I have to walk in there and take her clothes off and reassure her I'm right there before she'll let him bathe her. It's exhausting.
And, you're right, it's wonderful. That I can give her what she needs. That she sees that and loves me that much.
This was a wonderfully touching post, Gin! I love, LOVE, LOVE that my little man depends on me like he does. I do get tired and frustrated at times with teething and bedtime routines, but I wouldn't change a thing. (except maybe the teething, I could do without that)
These too are the BEST days of my life. I love cuddling him, kissing him and getting down on the floor and playing with him. He makes me so happy and I'm saddened by thought that this will all be over soon. Pretty soon he'll be a big boy who doesn't want to roll around in the grass with Mama, and that just breaks my heart.
Handsome has changed every aspect of my life, my thoughts and my goals for the future. I love him so much and I know I'll be devasted when he tells me not to kiss him in front of people! But that will happen later. For now, I'll cherish our time together and catch as much of it on camera as I possibly can.
I've been keeping up on all your posts the past few weeks, sorry about the absence of comments from me...i'm still stalking you...not to worry! =)
You my dear, have said what's in my heart but can't ever put two darn thoughts together to get them out on a post. You my dear, just made me cry and miss the baby days when i was more important than trains or Peppa Pig. =)
SO glad to know you are seeing these moments as a blessing and living there. In that moment. Good for you guys. =)
chat soon!
Andrea
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